Wellness for the People

Disclaimer: This is a transcription of an audio recording I did, intending it to be the start of a podcast (which still may or may not happen). It’s been mildly edited but still has some rough patches for authenticity sake. I realize now how often I say “but the point is” and “honestly” - sorry for that (not sorry).

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Wellness seems to have backed itself into a corner of being either expensive or unattainable or just not very realistic.


Weekly Massages are my Dream


For example, right now I don’t really have the money or – even if I had the money I wouldn’t have the time or the option – of going and getting a massage, because that’s just unrealistic for me. I have a baby at home, I’m trying to work from home more – so if I’m going to get a baby sitter it’s going to be so I can get more work done, not so that I can get a massage.


I know people will say, “You just have to make it a priority.” But – truly – I also have to work to make money for the massage, so maybe that should be my priority.


My point is, a lot of times the things that we think of as being “wellness” just don’t work in our lives. They work in other people’s lives who have access and money and time and resources to do those things. And I don’t hate on those things at all. Quite frankly I’m jealous. I would love to be in a place to get a massage every week. And if someday I am in that place to get a massage every week, you’re damn right I’m going to do it. Why wouldn’t I?


But my whole point is: I don’t have those resources and a lot of other people don’t either. The vast majority of what people see, whether it’s online via insta or wherever, a lot of times those things are just not realistic. It’s not even a matter of them being too expensive, it’s just that logistically it’s not realistic.


The Bathtub Obsession


Like taking baths. I have nothing against taking baths but I live in an old ass house and the bathtub is really small so I feel like a fucking giant when I’m in there, which, you know, is not exactly the mode I’m going for when I’m trying to self-care and feel good about myself and all that. I feel like a jolly green giant hanging out in this miniature bathtub… but also, my house is just really old, like I said, and the walls aren’t even real tile, it’s this weird fake tile that’s pealing or something? I don’t know. But even if it’s clean it just looks gross and it’s not pleasant. It’s just not an enjoyable experience.


So for me, I can fantasize about taking a nice luxurious bath but I mean none of that is realistic in my world right now. And if I didn’t have an old creepy ass bath tub, you’re damn right I’d make time for a bath every week. Because the point isn’t “taking a bath is overrated” – the point is “taking a bath for the sake of self-care is not realistic FOR ME.”


The Jade Roller Experience


My point is that it’s not even always a matter of having time or being able to afford it. I mean sometimes we just don’t have the things, you know? You know what I did do though? I did jump on the jade roller bandwagon. I scored a sweet jade roller at TJ Max for ten bucks. I try to use it every night because it’s hella relaxing and it feels really good on my sinuses but honestly I don’t use it every night because I don’t have like a religious night time routine, which maybe I should, but… I mean I have a good routine worked out for my evenings. But….. (insert inaudible rambling).


So my whole point to all of that, I think, what I’m saying is that sometimes, honestly, most of the time the picture that’s painted for us of what wellness is or what it looks like to have a good wellness routine, to really be taking care of yourself – the picture that’s created for us, of what that looks like, is not possible to recreate in our own lives.


Maybe it’s because you can’t afford the thing, or you don’t have time, or maybe you don’t have a decent bathtub – maybe you don’t even have a bathtub, you only have a stand up shower – so fuck you, you don’t get to take a bath – and you’re missing out on apparently a very important part of your self-care routine. So then what happens if you have serious FOMO over a bathing ritual? Well, I guess you’re not as good as the rest of us. It’s kind of how it feels. And in all honesty, we get like that about everything, so why wouldn’t we get like that about the wellness routine?


A Glammed Up Wellness Industry


And the wellness industry has gone super glam in the last handful of years – probably even more than that. The thing is, it’s making a lot of money, but it’s doing a huge disservice to a lot people because it’s presenting this picture of wildly unattainable things. So I guess what I’m saying is, I want to talk about what it really looks like. And hey, maybe for you it is a bath every Saturday night because you have a bitchin bathtub and that’s the only time you ever get to yourself. Maybe you only have a stand up shower and it pisses you off that you don’t get to take a bath. Okay, well let’s look at what you can do. Let’s look at ways you can bring wellness into your life and you can self-care and you can effectively address your own mental and emotional well-being.


How can you do that in your life? And I’m not talking about trying to recreate this pre-made image of wellness into your life because it’s not realistic. It’s not going to be effective and it sure as hell is not going to be sustainable.


So, how can we do that? Let’s talk about it.